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Wednesday 29 August 2018

The Untold Truth About Mentors, and Why You DON'T Need [Just] "One"

By: David Riklan

I think there is a misconception about what a mentor truly is. A mentor is someone who guides you, someone wise, someone you trust. A mentor can be your confidant, advisor, coach, or even your role model. Many people swear by their mentors and frequently credit them with much of their success.

Yet you do not have to choose just one! The mentor-protégé bond is certainly a special one, but this does not mean you are limited to the knowledge of only a single source. In the early years of my adult life, I was hoping to find just one person to guide me and direct me, but I never did find that person.
Over time, a few things became clear to me:

1. There is no single person who can provide us with every answer. So why abide by one mentor who you know cannot meet every requirement? I discovered that I could learn more, not by following the advice of a single person but by observing a multitude of people.

2. There is no perfect role model. I used to believe there was such a person and that I would simply model myself after him. All I would have to do is watch and do the things he or she did. Unfortunately, I haven't met that person yet.

3. There is no perfect person. Very few people possess all of the qualities that I think define success and happiness: great friends, career, health, family life, finances, social life, leisure, spiritual life, community involvement, etc. Most of the very successful people I've met had one or some of these, but hardly any had all of them. So why compare myself to the perfect person who doesn't exist?

4. I didn't have all of the answers, and I never will. I knew that I was going to make mistakes, but what I discovered was that it was much easier to learn from other people's mistakes than to make all of the mistakes myself.

To me, my mentor had to:

  • Take a personal interest in my development and support me in the avenues I take.
  • Help me strive toward the highest of aspirations, not only in career but in the satisfaction of life.
  • Want to share his knowledge and experiences, in hope that I reach a high level of achievement.
  • Show me the need to fulfill all responsibilities, both at home and away from it.
  • Care about the well-being of himself and his family.
  • Be a great overall example.
  • Needless to say, I still haven't found that one mentor yet.


Since I couldn't find that one special person to guide me, I needed to create a mentor. Now, how does one go about doing something like that? Well, it's not as hard as it seems. You first have to determine what you want. That is most important, not only because it's part of the mentor process but because it directly concerns what will make you happy in life.

Once you figure out what you want, find the people that have it or know how to get it and make sure they are willing to teach you how to get it. You don't even have to know them personally. As your mentors, they can teach you through a variety of ways: books, audio tapes, lectures, seminars, etc. A mentor then can have millions of protégés.

Here is some additional advice in finding mentors:

1. You can learn from practically anybody. In essence, anybody can be your mentor. Not only can you learn what to do or how to behave, you can also learn to avoid the wrong paths that others have followed.

2. Identify the key people in your life. Mentors can be close family members like parents or siblings, and they can also be public figures. Again, don't believe that you have to have a close relationship with your mentors. Public figures can be key people in your life because they can have a profound effect on how you live it.

3. Find people with specialized knowledge. If certain people have written an insightful book on a particular subject or have inspirational life experiences to share, then they might be possible mentors who can help in motivating you. Plus, if they are famous, they are easy to watch via television or the Internet, and their material is not difficult to find.

4. Try to ask as much as possible. Ask people for advice, ask them how they got where they are, ask them how you can get the same things. Also ask yourself what certain people would say or how they would act in specific situations. The more prepared you are, the less likely you'll make a mistake in the future.

5. Mentors can simply be people who are happy in life! Salary and position don't matter as long as there is contentment and commitment. Mentors can range from athletes and politicians to religious figures and stay-at-home mothers.

I have hundreds of mentors. So how many do you have?

This article is part of an Internet Course titled, "Self Improvement 101: The 62 Essential Truths about Improving Your Life! To get a Free Copy of the course ($59.00 Value), go directly to www.selfgrowth.com/articles101.html

Author Bio

David Riklan is the founder of www.SelfGrowth.com , the #1 Rated "Self Improvement" site on the Internet. He has created three inspiring resources to help with your journey to greater success. They include: "Self Improvement: The Top 101 Experts That Help Us Improve Our Lives" www.selfgrowth.com/products/top101.html & his FREE 6-part E-Course "Self Improvement 101: The 62 Essential Truths about Improving Your Life!" Details at: www.selfgrowth.com/articles101.html & he has created a phenomenal collection of Free Self Improvement and Self Help Newsletters that can be found by going to www.selfgrowth.com/products/newsletters.html

Monday 27 August 2018

Top 5 Reasons to Sing Out Your Stress


When people find out that I'm a music therapist, the comments I hear most often are "I wish I could sing!" or "Oh, I love to sing, but I'm not good enough to do it in front of anyone". Some of these people tell me that, as children, a parent, teacher or someone else told them that they should just mouth the words because they didn't have a good enough voice.

Singing is our birthright! Singing is a natural and pure expression of how glad we feel to be alive, and the way we show our love of music. Here are my top five reasons to sing out your stress:

1. To connect with your body: We sing with our whole bodies. Because singing is so connected to closely with breath, singing helps us "be in our bodies" and let go of the thinking (or worrying) we do much of the day. Singing can be a joyful activity and can release endorphins (those feel-good chemicals that the body creates).

2. To connect with yourself: Meditative toning, singing along to a favourite song or simply humming to yourself are all ways to tap into your inner landscape and see what's going on in there.

3. To connect with others: Singing with other people - in meditation, prayer, at a sing-along, at a concert, or even over the telephone or Internet - helps us experience in a very deep way that we are all truly connected.

4. To express your feelings: Many times a singer, songwriter or composer has expressed our feelings in a way we could never have - if there's a song that expresses what you want or need to say, try singing along (keep in mind that this is just for you and it's not about "sounding good").

5. To boost your good feelings: Whatever you focus on, you'll invite more of into your life. You can choose uplifting, joyful and celebratory songs to sing.

So sing out! Be proud of your own unique voice. Experiment with what works for you - keep a journal of what you notice in your mind and body when you sing specific songs. Then you can choose the right song for the right moment and make use of the power of singing in your own life.
Author Bio
Linda Dessau, BFA, MTA, CPCC is a self-care expert, accredited music therapist and certified life coach. Learn more about using singing for stress management, personal growth and spiritual development at www.singoutyourstress.com, where you can download the FREE report, "Top 10 Ways to Sing Out Your Stress".

Saturday 25 August 2018

Business Coaching; Learning to Change With the Market And Times


Business coaching is necessary for surpassing the current levels of performance and productivity. The challenges faced by today's organizations in terms of reinvention, reengineering, reorganizing and right sizing has forced them to utilize business coaching in order to compete in the current market environment. For the proper growth of any organization, it is necessary to have executives who are up-to-date with the recent trends and have beliefs, values, attitudes, motivation and thoughts that will drive them to excel. Business coaching provides the perfect platform for developing personal skills and behaviors that are necessary for implementing organizational changes and initiating the learning process.

Business coaching is required both at the executive and the managerial level for understanding the organization's current position and to decide its future growth patterns. Apart from effecting educational development and experience, coaching also provides objective feedback and acts as a critical tool for successfully engineering organizational change. For adapting to the rapidly shifting marketplace, organizations need to change their approach. However, this is often difficult to implement as people and organizations are naturally resistant to change. Business coaching has become a very effective tool for initiating productive changes in individuals, teams, and systems by enabling leaders, managers, and employees to uncover potential that might otherwise go untapped.

With the growing realization that profits, productivity, and customer satisfaction are the outcomes of performance rather than the cause, business coaching courses have started focusing more on leadership issues, cultural factors and the learning and development practices that drive performance. The goal of business coaching is not to be an alternative vehicle of managerial control, but rather it concentrates on empowering and delegating to create a culture of responsibility and self-generated, commitment-based actions. Coaching is certainly more than just a technique as it involves viewing the organization in a different perspective and working through relationships, dialogues and feedback for harnessing future potential and growth. It provides organizations with the capability of altering or shifting current work methods, internal and external communications and the framework within which employees normally operate. Business coaching has thus become very critical for modifying or creating an effective work environment that is more adaptable to change and growth.

Business coaching allows managers to play the role of professional business coaches for meeting organizational challenges and motivating others in their work environment. It creates the awareness among managers that by acting as coaches they can transform or create an organizational culture that is more receptive to change and open to new possibilities. Managers as coaches learn to increase self-awareness decide when and how to take action, find creative solutions, consider opinions and feedback from fellow employees, set targets, make appropriate requests, decrease hostility, and reduce stress and negative emotions in the workplace.

Coaching managers provide many direct benefits to the organization as managers get a clear idea about their commitments as well as those of the organization. They learn how to generate and maintain effective relationships, which in turn increases the levels of trust and accountability in the organization. Their understanding of organizational and interpersonal dynamics is increased considerably, allowing them to empower themselves and others to achieve organizational objectives. They learn how to take calculated risks for producing results aligned with organizational vision. They also learn to develop the right kind of unity and team spirit that will powerful work relationships that help achieve extraordinary results.
Author Bio
Visit www.businesscoach.com for more information, free articles and be sure to sign up for our newsletter. BusinessCoach.com is a full service Business Coaching firm, founded in 1989 and based on the philosophy of Gary B. Henson, an entrepreneur and business owner for over 25 years.